Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Historical Jams, Part I

Versailles, France
1778
To celebrate the birth of his first child, Louis XVI throws a costume party. After hors d'oeuvres and champagne are served, one of Marie Antoinette's ladies-in-waiting presents the royal couple with a jar of imported quince preserve that has been improperly sealed. Upon opening the gift a foul odor fills the hall, inciting a rumor that the Queen has farted and planting a seed of discontent amongst the people of Versailles

Athens, Greece
450 BC
A young Socrates enters his homemade fig jam in the local fair. He places a disappointing third, and in a fit of rage vows to dedicate his life to the pursuit of knowledge and the betterment of his community. He also invents that carnival game where you hit a sensor with a sledgehammer and try to make the bell ring

The Garden of Eden
Beginning of time
After eating from the tree of knowledge, Adam and Eve decide to use their leftovers to make a scrumptious apple jelly. It stimulates their minds so much that they invent the concept we now know as 'imagination'

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